• I feel extremely fortunate to have connected with Michelle in all the ways we have connected and to have learned from her. Each session has fostered a deeper connection, and though I have always felt comfortable and present in our sessions, I have been able to feel more present each time, as I develop a higher level of comfort and can get outside of my head. Michelle blends the best aspects of a coach, listener, mentor, and trusted friend, providing a personal aspect to her work, and reaching into her clinical toolbox when necessary. Michelle has been my cheerleader from our very first Zoom call before our first session, helping me improve other aspects of my life and relationships. I have been able to gain confidence where I did not have it before and to build on confidence I already had. In any field, it is important to inject a part of yourself into your work to provide the best outcome for a client. With Human Connection, it is even more important. Michelle brings herself to each session, combining her clinical knowledge, and more importantly her caringness. The entire three-hour session, from seeing your face at the door to our last hug, was wonderful. It’s so difficult to pinpoint what I liked best; however, one of the things I liked best was the mirror exercise. The mirror exercise was transforming and healing.  When I looked in the mirror, I immediately saw myself in a positive way I hadn't before.  But I also saw two people evolving in their journeys, sharing a natural moment, and I felt incredibly validated and supported by you (part therapist, part listener, part nurturer, part trusted friend).  I am thankful to experience that in a non-kinky and non-sexual way.   I didn’t expect to do that together. Standing in front of the mirror together gave it a completely different feel to what I envisioned and had seen on TV. It was an incredibly bonding experience and changed how I view myself. Everyone should experience that. Another thing I liked best about the session was your willingness to be vulnerable and allow me to hold a bit of space for you. It is a good feeling to reciprocate some of the comfort and positive vibes you have provided me. And YES, I fully support you in any direction you take your work. Any stepped-up intimacy or kink exploration in the sessions was exquisitely wonderful but is an encapsulation within the overall connection. That overall connection is priceless. It’s hard to put into words how nurturing a cuddle session is, and a naked platonic cuddle felt so natural. Everyone should experience that as well.

    In-Person Client

  • “Few practitioners can blend their own humanity with their expertise as readily and sincerely as Michelle. Her openhearted, well-boundaried poise is the hallmark of her distinct brand of compassionate professionalism. Her character and practice model a soft power, firm courage, and guiding discipline that is aspirational to clients and colleagues alike.”

    Brandon Hunter-Haydon, MSW, CSE, RYT, and Surrogate Partner

  • "I read the article about Justin's surrogate experience, and it is soo true that after a while, people start to look at you differently. To the best of my knowledge I haven't done anything particularly different look wise, but I've had friends and strangers alike be very engaging and comment about how happy I look. The only thing I can attribute it too is working with you, it's the only more recent thing I've been doing in my file. I've noticed a difference in myself as well in being more present and listening attentively when people are talking and making more eye contact, which I didn't notice that I tended to look off or away when people spoke to me. I really appreciate and value your time and presence and the change you've made in my life."

    In-Person Client

    (To read the article mentioned, click here.)

  • "This feedback is long overdue but I've been making great strides in my journey and I have to send a big thanks to you. I don't know where I would be, had you not provided me with the safe space and affirming words regarding certain things I was experiencing. The sessions were truly a catapult for many aspects of my personal growth during the past few months. Most of all you provided me with "you." You are quite special and have been a benchmark as to how I am able to view and connect with others. In a general sense, my favorite part of this session was that I was able to explore some things I'd longed to experience but at the same time was a little nervous about. You helped me peel a few more layers from my shell."

    In-Person Client

  • "I really appreciate your willingness to work with me virtually. I know it’s not ideal bc of the work you do, but even over Zoom it means a great deal to me to share space and work through these challenges together. Digital video and sound may not be the same as in-person sessions, but your warmth and openness still preside because that’s who you are. You graciously make room for questions, curiosities, insights, and emotionality. I feel like I could go in any direction in a session, and you would be there to safely see, hear, and accept me. I also love that you are ok expressing emotions along side me so I don’t feel like an island. The comfort and care you offer is unlike anything I’ve experienced in therapy or life, and for that I’m incredibly grateful. Finally, I truly admire your amazing authenticity, and I find myself wanting to live with the same genuine honesty, confidence, and enthusiasm that you bring to the world. To sum it up: I kinda want to be you when I grow up!" .......    Follow Up after In-Person Session     ......  "I sincerely loved everything about my visit with you, and I am so incredibly grateful for your time and generous presence.  I don't think I've ever felt so safe and comfortable in an intimate space, and that's certainly a product of how you put me and kept me at ease.  While I was anxious before I arrived (and even the first couple minutes on the couch), I was surprised at how fast/easy it was to settle into a cuddle with you.  As I said at the time, I had never cuddled platonically, but in a matter of minutes, it felt totally normal and easy to have your arms, body, legs, and feet entwined with me.  I really liked getting to chat and connect as we figured out what types of touch could be added.  Everything we tried was positive for me--nothing felt forced or awkward, just natural and comfortable.  While I know you are a professional doing a job, I also felt that you wanted to be there with me; it didn't ever seem like you were accomplishing tasks or checking off a list with me.  That meant a great deal to me because being present and authentic are essential qualities for me in an intimate (even platonic) space.  This might sound strange, but I am a little proud of myself for pushing through the fear and trauma of the scars on my body in order to find positive feelings and sensations around those same places.  I honestly never thought I would be ok with anyone seeing my stomach or touching me there, and I will remember those moments with you for the rest of my life. Through that experience and the face touching, I know I have some techniques to try with my wife, perhaps as soon as this weekend, and I am more confident and open and enthusiastic about wading into this space than I have been for a long time.  And I have you to thank for all of that.  I still have challenges to overcome (asking for and accepting pleasure, finding renewed confidence in a sexual context despite my  dysfunction), but at the moment I feel really good. I do wish I could have another hug or cuddle or foot embrace with you ;-), but I don't feel a big dip emotionally so far.  Positivity, hopefulness, and gratitude are the emotions that seem to be most present right now, and I plan to keep those at the top of my mind for as long as possible.  Given my wife's enthusiastic blessing of my session with you, I am hoping to return to SD again in the next year.  I will certainly let you know if/when that happens.  In the meantime, I will stay in touch periodically if that's ok.    Thank you, again, for everything!"

    — Virtual Client turned In-Person Client

  • "Michelle Renee is a gifted surrogate partner, who I had the joy of working with this past fall (2022 ). Michelle responded promptly to my inquiry , initially we met on FaceTime , where her knowledge and awareness of the triadic relationship of surrogate work was clearly communicated. During the initial 3 way meeting with my client, her warmth, sensual and sexual knowledge along with a clear sense of professional boundaries was easily communicated. She presents her authentic self with a healthy sense of humor and naturalness . As she worked with my client she made valuable astute observations along with well crafted and detailed written feedback of her sessions with the client. My client was very pleased and benefited greatly from the work. It is with great pleasure that I recommend Michelle as a surrogate partner and colleague."

    Bryce Britton, MS (Collaborating Clinician)

  • "It was a wonderful experience! I felt very safe and at home with Michelle. She exudes a warmth and kindness that I instantly felt comfortable with. Frankly, I was surprised at how beneficial and powerful her touch was for me. I still feel the resounding effect over a week later. I highly recommend her."

  • "You generously offer safe space to open up, feel my feelings and let go."

  • "Michelle is a passionate, ever-evolving professional. Over the course of years that we've been colleagues, I've always benefitted from her loving, kind, bright presence. I trust Michelle and refer clients her way regularly. If you're considering her services, I strongly recommend that you get to know this caring practitioner."

    — Jean Franzblau, Cuddle Sanctuary

  • “Michelle is one of the most compassionate and thoughtful human beings on this planet. Not only that but Michelle is extremely, and I mean extremely, dedicated to her work. She is constantly doing more to expand the field, serve her community, open doors for clients and clinicians. Michelle lobbied me to do a course on Surrogate Partner Therapy (SPT) which was tremendously helpful in our clinical work together. She is consistently learning more about different therapeutic techniques and interventions. She even bought and read a dense trauma book made for clinicians to understand more about exposure therapy. Working with Michelle has truly opened my eyes to the immense power and healing of SPT. I am grateful that she was my first experience working with a surrogate partner and I know this relationship will go on for the rest of our careers.”

    — Vanessa Cushing, MS, NCC (Collaborating Clinician)

  • “Having read a few books on kink, negotiation looked easy to my IT-engineer’s mind until my first attempt to do it. Although my mind has always understood, without difficulty, that a “No” is a validation of “Yes”, my body never got it. Whenever I tried to negotiate play I would shut down and collapse upon hearing the first “No”, making any further play next to impossible. To get over this hurdle, I needed someone trustworthy, generous, known for solid boundaries, and whom I am attracted to – in order to practice erotic requests under emotional pressure while receiving No’s and Yes’s as they come. Michelle’s Destination Intimacy in San Diego was an excellent choice for that type of experience. By the time of my session, I was comfortably immersed in Michelle’s warm attention as we had already spent several hours getting used to each other’s closeness by hanging out on the beach, watching seals and sea lions. Going home right away after my session would have been like being caught naked in a snowstorm. There is a good reason why this should be a whole day. Going back to the oceanfront to watch the bioluminescence, while holding hands after light dinner together, was a soft landing out of paradise. Our session was rich, and I needed that time to slip gently out of Michelle’s charm. Thank you, Michelle. Not only did I learn but I also lived a lot on that day.”

    — Ondrej (franek.ondrej@gmail.com)

  • “Hello. First I must tell you why I am giving a review of my experience working with Michelle Renee in this private matter in my life. First, I am a queer trans woman and I felt like I was the first trans person ever to use this therapy (SPT). Michelle told me I was wrong, but if sharing my story can help even one trans person feel more comfortable using this therapy or decide to work with Michelle, this will be worth it. Second, shame and fear of my sexuality left me in a very dark place for far too many years. I hope this helps in a small way with ending sexual shame. How I got here – the short version. I was assigned male at birth and raised as one. When I entered male puberty, I experimented with different ways to masturbate which lead to “cross-dressing.” My emotions were all over the place as I tried to understand my desires. When I couldn’t will away my desire to crossdress, my confusion turned to fear and that fear and shame grew into my biggest secret. I felt my sexuality was broken or evil. Fast forward many many years; I am an out and proud trans woman who is comfortable being herself in the world. My new secret is: I left behind my sexuality. I started my personal growth and healing in exploring platonic touch. Being raised male, I didn’t know such loving affectionate touch, that didn’t involve sex, even existed. I was able to heal and grow so much in the platonic cuddling community. I quickly became a Cuddle Party veteran. As I became more confident in asking for what I wanted, I eventually asked a close friend in the cuddle community for help in growing beyond platonic-only intimacy. This led me to Michelle. I was scared when I went to my first session with Michelle. Will we connect? What if we don’t? Who else would work with a trans woman if this doesn’t work? Michelle welcomed me into her space and I felt a warm loving energy from her. That helped a lot to calm my nerves. I shared with her my history and my current feelings as we got to know a bit about each other. Then we started cuddling where I was already comfortable bonding with people. Then we cuddled in our underwear. I was embarrassed at how scared I felt, but the fear was replaced with loving warmth and loving energy from Michelle. During the next session, we first talked about what my plan is and when I would know our work was done. I told Michelle my goal is to be comfortable dating in the BDSM community where I can ask for what I want and assert my boundaries with confidence. When I fell in love with Michelle, is when I started to feel confident being naked together. I felt safe with Michelle as I entered my challenge zone beyond my comfort zone. I grew so much with the experience of a sexual relationship. I find most of my growth and personal healing was in growing our relationship. The sex was the very pleasurable reward for our relationship. I felt the pace of our work together was right as I needed about a month to process most of my new experiences. I am currently in my last few sessions with Michelle. I feel sad that we will soon be ending our work together and “breaking up.” What helps me deal with the sadness is realizing I am growing out of the safety container of our short few-hour sessions together. I am ready and looking forward to, hope to, have a longer relationship with a new love. For so many years I was so scared I would never get close enough to anyone to have a sexual relationship. Working with Michelle has been a dream come true. Michelle is a dream come true. I will always have a place in my heart for her. Whoever reads this I wish you well in your healing journey and hope Michelle can be a part of your journey as well.”

  • “I had a great time yesterday. Your company and cuddles were healing. I called my mom after our session and both relief cried and couldn’t stop smiling. I feel very good about the way things were facilitated. I felt safe. I felt like I could voice things that I needed to voice. There was also a handy structure and reassurance for me in the knowledge that you knew what you were doing and I didn’t have to flail my way through (anymore than the usual flailing that occurs for me that is 😛 ). I felt like there was space to be authentically me and focus on self regulation and becoming attuned to my body again because of the environment you brought. It’s really cool to be in a space that intimate where I can try to unmask as much as possible. Autopilot for me is a really big thing to tackle after being on it so much of my life within social situations. It felt pretty great, albeit also hard, to do some more work on that in a setting like this.”

  • “I enjoyed many aspects of my time with Michelle! What touched me most of all was her attitude and her approach. She was SO nonjudgmental and SO playful. I think a successful session has more to do with mindset than the activity itself. Michelle’s acceptance and easy manner made for an amazing head trip.”

  • “Michelle is an absolute delight. I had my first cuddling session ever with her and she took the time to ease my nerves, resolve my concerns and she really helped me to be comfortable with connecting with another person again. I appreciate her love of cuddling and her ability to just *listen*. I can’t wait for our next cuddle!”

  • “I know you said that you were going to contact me to check-in, but I just couldn’t wait to let you know how much good I think yesterday’s session did. I was all warm and fuzzy inside driving home afterwards, and I still feel kind of glowing. Today I feel more human – or at least less isolated from humanity in general than I did before. I may not be explaining this very well, but I hope (and suspect!) you know what I mean.”

  • “I have a resource that won’t judge me and I can find nurturing with.”

  • “I am feeling really good. I had a couple of situations that would have usually made me anxious, but I was surprisingly calm. Thank you for your help.”

  • “I’ve become someone who has better skills at asking for my wants, needs, recognizing where I stand with my body. Even better, that seeps into my work, family, and where I now know what I want and don’t like.”

  • “This is what it feels like to feel human again,” said with a sigh of relaxation.

    – during our 1st session

  • “I’m sending you a great big wave of gratitude. I feel so fortunate to have found you and to have benefited so much already. ***Thank you!***”

    – after our 2nd session

  • “The feeling of being in my body is so different after you’ve been here.”

    – after 3rd session

  • “I think the biggest benefit of cuddling for me is that it provides a foundation of comfort and safety… Using cuddling *in conjunction* with psychotherapy is incredibly powerful. I intend to continue with both because the benefits and momentum achieved from combining them is just incredible.”

    – many sessions later

  • “I felt great afterwards, and still am feeling great right now! … You’re really good! It was lovely cuddling with you too, definitely worth the trip from LA! I like how you start your sessions with a set of questions, where I had to answer yes or no to all of them, and pay attention to my body’s reactions as I answered each question. I enjoyed all the cuddling positions, especially the last one before the session ended, because it was very intimate. I like to be close whenever I cuddle with someone. What I wish was different? Well, nothing really, but maybe that the time would not have gone by so quickly since I was enjoying it so much!”

  • “This is the first time I’ve felt human.”

  • “I honestly cannot put into words the feelings I have when you help me just be me.”